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Tuesday / 31 July '01

Hour we arose Sunday morning: 3:15am

Time we arrived to the West side of Central Park to queue up for tickets to Public Theatre's The Seagull by Chekov, as adapted by Tom Stoppard and directed by Mike Nichols, starring Philip Seymour Hoffman, Kevin Kline, Meryl Streep, Christopher Walken, Marcia Gay Harden, Natalie Portman, John Goodman etc: 4:20 am

Number of people who were already in line in front of us at that hour: 97

Number of people in our group / number of tickets we could get: 3 / 6 (2 each)

Ratio of people in our party to number of thermoses of coffee we drank: 1:1

Number of krispy kreme donuts we consumed: 6

Minutes it took to consume said donuts: 2

Hour they allowed us into Central Park to continue our waiting for a chance to get tickets: 5:30 am

Hour they hand out tickets to the lucky people who actually get them: 1:00 pm

Number of people we saw cutting in line in front of us: 4

Hours the enormous drunk guy slept like a baby on the lawn snoring loudly: 5

Number of squirrels to fall out of a tree near us: 1

Hour that the first people in line arrived in the park to queue up: 10:00 pm previous night

Number of books I read while waiting: 0

Total number of hours we waited in line for the tickets: 9

Running time of the Chekov play: under 3 hours

Hours between when we were handed our tickets and the time the play began: 6.5

Number of cartwheels Meryl Streep did onstage: 1

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
It was worth it all... the waiting, the fact that I'm still trying to catch up on sleep, the fantasies I had of curling up on the couch which was part of the set during the play's second act. The play was a comedy, yet deeply sad, very tragic, beautiful. Jan (mom) was visiting, and we were able to get enough tickets for her, ourselves, and her travel friends Bonnie and Peggie.

Wednesday / 25 July '01

Speaking of journals:1000 Journals looks incredible.

Two nights in a row: dreams of snow. And cars. Cars in snow. On the hottest day of the summer, what does dreaming of snow mean? Just a reaction to the heat? My gut tells me non! It's much, much more than that... but what?

In each dream, I realize there's snow everywhere... and then I get into a car.

First night: Car is identical to ex-boyfriend's. I get into car alone, in drivers' seat. Car spins out of control immediately on a small decline as i pull into parking lot. Car sliding on fresh snow. Parkinglot is thankfully empty except for ambulance, being shovelled out. Car keeps spinning while I try unsuccessfully to steer, seeing the mall surrounding the parking lot spinning before me in fast spirals through the windshield. In a split second I see someone point to the left, directing me to steer my wheels that way. Doesn't help. Still spinning. Avoiding running into mall. Car finally comes to gradual stop in a narrow alley as I exit the parking lot.

Second night: The car is a beater, and I'm in San Diego on an extended layover from a flight I'm supposed to be taking to Africa. I comment that San Diego seems like a nice town, it's beautiful and sunny, but snow everywhere, and I get into this beater car which is supposed to be a cab. It's navy blue, and I cannot pull the door closed, from the passenger seat side. I keep trying and trying, slamming and slamming the door as the driver is pulling away, taking us to a chain restaurant ... finally with my hardest yank I get the door shut.

Sleeps Dream Dictionary analizes snow this way:
SNOW: To dream of snow in all its forms, on trees, storms, etc., is a dream of very good omen which shows you will have success in business or investments, but if you should eat the snow this will presage a long period of sadness for the dreamer.

I can report with great relief that I didn't eat the snow. But what about the cars? Do car dreams really symbolize your sex life? Lets See...

CARS: If you dream of a railroad car, or a cable car your dreams of being rich will always be dreams, but your income should be adequate for your lifestyle. See automobile.

okay... that makes some sense although kind of cramps my style with the snow definition.. so i'm going for autmobile, since that's what they really were...
Automobiles: Vehicles that you ride in usually reflect two things: the direction you are heading in life, and your body (the thing you travel or "ride" through life in). ...The condition of the vehicle might give you an idea of your health. Driving an old beat up car down a muddy road on a stormy night would be considered a pretty bad dream! However flying a Lear jet through blue skies with a song in your heart and the wind at your tail would be a rather good dream.

But, there was so much more to the dream, that might be more worthy of analysis (Oh go on, you're saying...)
So if you dare... here's the entire dream, unedited...

<unedited dream>
Burning house. I have foresite that this house, two stories, filled with some family i seem to know well, will be burned down, even though now there is only evidence of a scent and faint sight of smoke. I instruct: "Get the children out. Here's what you all need to do: go, get the baby... don't go looking for your favorite things, objects, etc. you need to just get out of the house." but then later, we had some time to go through and find stuff. searching through suitcases finding things i don't care about, deciding i can leave them behind, let them burn.

Then on my way out the door, on top of a large television set, (old 70s style, the kind that sits on the floor) i see a few ceramics items, Dave Tell things that i care dearly about. i grab them in my arms, balancing them, hoping they won't break, etc.

Later: we retreat to a local 'renovated' illegal type factory-loft, somewhere. But it is on the first floor. It's darkish, not many windows, but it's modern, intentionally designed. This is the home of are our friends. We know them to be Arabic. We are confidants, we can trust them. Its like we (we?) are hiding out here.

As i round a corner to enter the hideout's front room, I'm alone except that accompanied by our 'family dog' or a dog that i understand to be with me, mine... Medium sized, sandy, cute... We are rounded-- headed off-- by a pack of the Arabic families' pets: all dogs and cats, siamese cats, other cats, dogs. They form a swarm, almost. Their leader is a very large dog... a saint bernard of sorts, but bigger, big face, humerous face... he almost has glasses, a mustache, gold chains. He's part Big Pun, almost. Yet Dog. My dog barks and gears up to stand-off to him, protecting me... and also he's just being a dog... but the leader, big-dog-man-guy (did i say part Leon Redbone too? as if he might even sport a top hat?) just kind of puffs his chest out, and finds it humerous, my comaratively small dog trying to face off to him. Big dog laughs, smirks, even puts out a hand/paw, in the 'woah, hold up' motion... he says "now don't even attempt to do this little guy, just reeelax, relax, sit back..." I dont know if he was just going to let us into the room anyway, but he needed to establish his dominance first. He was humored, yet definitely displaying his bravado. he was good though. We knew this.

We were allowed into the room now, my dog subsiding... the dog/man/bigpun/leonredbone/arabic guy, for now he had morphed more into one of the family members, yet still the same character, was telling us about how he has been reading texts, has started to question certain aspects of his Arabic religion, or of it's traditions, and practices. not to deny the religious credibility, not to be 'heretic' but instead to try to cut through some of the possible customary, cultural obstacles, and get closer to the real Allah, to strengthen his Muslim practice. He knew it was risky. Many Muslims might not understand.... might think him blasphemous. but he likened it to trying to get closer to a Christian God by maybe questioning, studying or working around Jesus. i said i understood. thought it to be a highly evolved and intelligent thing to be thinking about. even for the questioning and the inquiry part of it. i didn't have any thoughts on if he were right or wrong. but one of the customs i knew and understood, for example, was the washing of the feet... before prayer. seems inconsequential, especially cause i myslef was washing my feet to clean and cool them off in the evening heat yesterday before i went to bed and had this dream. however, sometime after, i am talking with the big man dog, i notice my mouth is full of wax. i cannot talk, i cannot seem to get the wax out. its mushy, sticky, almost criscolike. i keep bunching up my lips, trying to expell it, but whenever i get some out, there's always more in there... i cannot talk.

Then: the car. I left the arabic hidout safe-haven, i had to go somewhere. i got into a car alone, a red stationwagon, identical to the one john my exboyfriend had left here when he moved away from nyc. i understood that i had already sold that car, so this wasn't the 'actual car' but i was confused as to why i had a replica of that old car.... maybe it was his cousins' or something. so i get in... and as i head out to drive (where am i going?) i have to go through a large parking lot. it's an empty mall lot. no other cars there, save an ambulance parked on the edge, near a building of the 'mall'... there is snow everwhere... a light fresh layer of white snow on everything. it isn't snowing now though. i see two employees of the 'ambulance service' cleaning up things around the ambulance... shovelling snow. first i wondered what they were doing up, out at this hour.. nobody else seemed to be around. Then i realized , they are the ambulance service. they always need to be prepared. even in this weather. as i drive into the lot, i have to go through a slight steep decline, and i immediately build up speed... it's so slippery from the snow, and at first i think oh its fun, i'll do a donut or two then the car will stop. But No, I am speeding forward out of control!!! i try stepping gingerly on the breaks. but i swerve. so i steer into it. no, i steer against it. i pump the breaks. i try everything.... the car keeps spinning, speeding, not slowing down at all.... i see out the windshield the mall zooming by in a spiral. i get a glimpse of a person sitting on a chair outside a store or building, and i see him point and gesture/point his thumb to the left, i had been rotating the wheel to the right. so i switched my steering, hoping this was the answer. it didn't really help, as i was still spinning out of control, so fast... sometimes getting near the buildings, then veering, steering, breaking enough to get away and out, back into the middle of the lot. Then ifinally find that i am speeding out of the lot, down an alley, and the car slowly seems like it's going to come to a stop. and i realzie that i'll be okay.... the car is finally slowing down. i knew it was bound to happen eventually.
</unedited dream>
whew. sorry about that.

Tuesday / 24 July '01.











+ + +

+ Sleeping in Central Park : [july 31 '01]
+ In the cracks : [july 22 '01]
+ Home to Bloom; Home to Bkln : [july 11 '01]
+ You can quote me : [july 6 '01]
+ Me and Bridget, by the Bridge : [june 30 '01]
+ Dropped it, ate it anyway : [june 21 '01]
+ Deep into the Moroccan medina : [june 15 '01]
+ Arlo ran away, got fired from job : [may 19 '01]
+ Art opening Sightings : [may 12 '01]
+ Thumbs Up on Broadway : [may 11 '01]
+ My Own Mirror Project : [may 10 '01]
+ meet Trixie : [may 07 '01]
+ billboard giantess : [may 03 '01]
+ pierced and chained boobs? : [may 01 '01]
+ Years of NYC residue : [apr 27 '01]
+ Willie and wieners : [apr 23 '01]
+ rolling the street cart : [apr 20 '01]
+ BROOKLYN jackhammers : [apr 19 '01]
+ easter day was one of drinking : [apr 16 '01]
+ my blood was let : [apr 12 '01]
+ THIS PLACE IS SO 5 MINUTES AGO : [apr 3 '01]
+ help is on the way : [mar 30'01]
+ a love letter to... : [mar 27'01]
+ big afro in the Bleecker station: [mar 20'01]
+ the progress of hangingout: [mar 14'01]
+ i can rap, you know: [mar 13'01]
+ hitchhiking, snowboarding: [mar 09'01]
+ candid new york: [feb 27 '01]
+ i drank 3 beers: [feb 16 '01]
+ giant twat pear: [feb 12 '01]
+ cat fight : [feb 11 '01]
+ babies and brandons: [feb 08 '01]
+ if we took a holiday. holiday: [feb 03 '01]
+ join me in my egofest: [feb 02 '01]
+ beaucoup des phoblography: [jan 30 '01]
+ was, like, just yesterday: [jan 29 '01]
+ i was vaguely grim: [jan 27 '01]
+ eqb's soul was found: [jan 18 '01]
+ some things were found: [jan 16 '01]
+ what is hot? what is not?: [jan 13 '01]
+ this was the first of the year: [jan 01, 01]
+ because i care about you: [dec 26, 00]
+ read last week's entry: [dec 19, 00]
+ because: [dec 12, 00]
+ you never know: [dec 05, 00]
+ what you're missing: [nov 29, 00]
+ it all started here: [nov 22, 00]

spycam picture du jour
briget jones reader
[click image for big version] Briget Jones reader on the L platform late at night after the Tortoise show, which we didn't even enjoy very much.

liz smith reader
[click image for big version] Reader of Liz Smith on the L train.

mrs doubtfire
[click image for big version] At some Conde Nast gig... Mrs. Doubtfire?

I got some thing from some folks...

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