Now, Shopping. Shopping is fun when you have no money, when you don't need anything, when you aren't shopping on purpose but just accidentally found an
In God We Trust necklace that perfectly suited you while you were trying to pick out a
mothers' day gift.
It turns out shopping sucks when you have a set budget, purpose, intent, acutal garment needs, and dedicatedtime to do it, in between your several hours a day at the computer, the pilates, the banjo classes... in between the folks visit and boyfriends' folks visit (simultaneously actually), the babysitting, the watching of
gilmore girls...
I've put seriously a lot of effort into shopping this week. I've bought only one item,
(well two) and here's what I've learned:
Barney's skinny-mirrors on the Co-Op floor are an engineering feat to be marvelled at. Go on, sisters-of-Narcissius, stare, longer. Look from this angle and that angle, spare no angle. Whether you find it unnerving or just wish you had one at home, spend as much time as you want behind the curtain here with the skinny-mirror, but don't buy that new painted-on pair of white jeans based solely on what skinny-mirror tells you (or at least bring along a trusted friend). The skinny mirror is the other
Bright Shining Lie.
But, how do you know when to cut your losses? After you've spent 90 minutes at Barney's, is it OK to leave empty handed? After so much effort trying on Marc Jacobs things you know you can't afford, there's strong desire to at least walk out the door with something to show for your time.
Don't buy the gem-priced fishnet footies on ground floor. Probably better to just go home with your $85 still in your pocket.
Really. Good. Fitting. Jeans. (A moment of silence please, because we cannot find Adeli Katayone anywhere. Are the rumors true? Did the penultimate pants-maker go out of business? Please someone, tell me if you see her...)
Really Good Fitting Jeans now cost $200
("but think how often you'll wear them...").
And you can now get your own jeans custom made-to-order, somewhere in the Meat Packing District, behind lock and key, at the Ernest Sewn custom jeans making shoppe. It used to be enough to face the tough decision: Which size to choose between the 2 sizes you inevitably fall betwixed?
Tight-fitted-slighlty uncomfortable-room-to-stretch-but never-throw-in-dryer
-- vs.--
Comfy-looser-baggyish-(saggyass?)-with-room-to-shrink.
???
But now in addition to size decision, you get to choose your own rivets, fabric, and pocket pattern (I haven't actually done this. I saved torturous decisions and $75 by buying mine pre-made at
Steven Alan.) Turns out
you can find Ernest Sewn jeans ebay too.
P.S. Women's pants' legs are all made for that common 7-foot-tall woman.
Blouses: The Indian-style shirt:
in.
Despite the mistake it seemed to be a few years ago, the prairie look is evermore infiltrating.
Resist! Ah I'm kidding. That stuff is... nice. ...I guess.
But... that old skool Gunne Sax lacey shiny-satiny blouse I bought on the street last summer has sure paid for itself. Derivatives are filling up the first floor of
Anthropolgy, for like a gazillion dollars more. Hit your thrift stores, ladies.
Everyone's sold out of
United Bamboo in nyc. So don't even go looking i'm serious ... except for a lipstick stained blouse and an amazing heavily silk patterened dress at I Heart on Mott, which I can't imagine wearing unless my future holds an invitiation to attend a baroque Thanksgiving dinner hosted in an old abandoned house with tobacco-and-rain-stained walls and antique Eastern rugs so chewed and corroded you can barely makeout their patterns, and there should be trees growing in through holes in the roof --the shaggy kudzu-y kind of tree related to the willow but more sappy-- somewhere in LA (that's Louisana, not the other).... Hmm, maybe I will go back for that dress when it's marked to 70% off. Just in case.
Every store has more t-shirts than just about anything else in stock (except the prairie skirt, why why why?). Some trends reappear every few years or so, only to fade fast at season's end, like those pants... You know the ones, with the little drawstring ties at the ankles? This year's returning-5-minute-thing seems to be those-knee-length-trouser-shorts.
But T-shirts seem to be here to stay. T-shirts have become the new jeans. T-shirts are the new oxygen! Unquestioned. Givens. Requistite staples and
canvases for creativity.
Don't go wearing a blazer without one. Seriously.
+ The last time I wrote about T-shirts was in 2002 (i apologized for the banality then, too, as i do now, below.
This post is proof that the Prairie thing was among us then, too. Since 2002 folks, 3 years ago! Can't mod come back, again-again, instead?)
+ I quickly followed up the Fashion-2002 post with a T-shirt slideshow:
And speaking of T-shirts:
Defunker has launched, brought to you by the
bustedtees guys. Defunker's tees are more artsy, less hipster-urban-outfittersishy. Oh, and jason kottke models: Seen here in the fetching
Octopus t-shirt.
Octopuses are kind of the best thing going. And also flowers, and microscopic algae. And sunsets. And those giant squids they've discovered, with their parrot beaks, and their ink, and their electricity, and colors changing, and their angry emotions. Male octopusses (or Octopii if you please) mate by using their 'special purpose arm' -- it's a lot like one of their 7 other arms, but, you know, it's special.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
And speaking of sunsets:
May 28 and July 12 are New York City's
Gotham Equinox days. Hurry! Someone create a new
flickr tag.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
With apologies for all the vapidity. I probably won't go retail shopping again for another year, starting right after I get that heavy silk Thanksgiving-dinner-in-Louisana dress. Just in case.